Some people assume that sexual orientation and gender identity are closely linked — but I like to think of them in terms of the elements. Imagine a ship making its way across the ocean.
It is carried on its journey by the winds above and the tides and currents of the waters below. In the far distance, the ship’s destination calls to it — a place that feels like home that it can’t help but be drawn toward. The ship and its destination are inextricably linked but not the same. With or without the destination, the ship is what it is — and the destination would be the same, no matter what type of ship was sailing toward it.
In this example, the ship is a person’s gender identity, and their destination is their sexual orientation. While we tend to think of these two things as related, they are distinct. In today’s article, we’ll explore the differences between the two and dispel some of the myths surrounding them.
Gender Identity
When discussing gender identity, it’s important first to clarify that birth sex and gender identity are distinct. A person’s birth sex relates to their physical body, while their gender identity is best understood as how they perceive themselves. When a person’s birth sex and gender identity match, they are said to be cisgender; when they do not match, they are said to be transgender.
While it can be tempting to reduce gender to biology, the reality is more complex. We often describe certain attributes and personality traits as masculine or feminine, and these don’t always neatly line up. Many societies throughout history have often taken a more nuanced view that allowed people to express gender identity in a variety of ways. While many transgender people identify as male or female, others regard themselves as genderfluid or agender. A genderfluid person may feel like their identity changes over time or in certain situations, while an agender person may feel that neither male nor female properly describes them.
Some important terms to know related to gender identity:
Assigned Gender: The gender someone is assigned at birth.
Transgender: Someone whose gender identity differs from their sex assigned at birth.
Non-Binary: A person who identifies as a mix of genders, neither gender, or something else. Sometimes referred to as an “enby” in place of male or female.
Gender Expression: The way a person expresses their gender — often through behavior or clothing.
Pronouns: Words are used to refer to people in the abstract: they/them, she/her, he/him.
Sexual Orientation
In contrast to gender identity, sexual orientation describes who a person is romantically or physically attracted. Returning to our example of the ship journeying across the ocean, our sexual orientation is the compass that guides us to our destination. We may not always know where we’re headed, but our compass points us in a certain direction, and we can feel the pull of our heart’s desire.
There is a wide array of sexual orientations and types of attractions; some commonly understood orientations are:
Homosexual: An individual who is attracted to their same gender.
Heterosexual: Someone who is attracted to a different gender.
Bisexual: Someone who is attracted to both men and women.
Pansexual: Someone who is attracted to all genders.
Asexual: Someone who is not sexually attracted to any gender.
While our understanding of sexuality has changed throughout history, the diversity of human sexuality remains consistent throughout. Mythology, folklore, and historical records all support humanity’s ongoing efforts to understand both sexuality and gender.
Reach Out Today
Gender identity and sexual orientation are complex subjects, further complicated by social pressures and lack of education. Individuals who are forced to hide or conceal their sexual orientation or gender identity may struggle with isolation, depression, and anxiety. Reach out to us today if you’re looking for support. You don’t have to make this journey alone.
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